Have you ever gone to someone to ask “Do you believe in me?” or likewise have you questioned why people don’t believe in you?
Many of us have likely experienced this at some point in time. I am not ashamed to say I have at times asked the very same questions, sometimes they may lie silent or dormant within, but they are there. What is the driving force for this want or need to have others believe in us? Recently I have been in the situation where I have been faced with this thought process, the feeling, the need to have others provide their opinion of me. The space of doubt and fear that looks for freedom in words from those around us is a murky road. Often we find the response received is not adequate to what we feel is needed, looking to others for what lies within provides no freedom from this process.
No-One can heal this ultimately sabotaging behaviour for us, we can only find the answers that lie within our own being, this need only arises from an inner lack of believing in your own ability. Some of the greatest achievements in human history have been made from individual’s determination and belief when all those around them thought otherwise, what does this tell us?
How can we actually expect anyone to see what we are unable to? Using the mirror of relationship we can see in others what we cannot in our own existence. There are times when those outside of you can see your gifts and do believe in you, however this is something that comes freely from others, and it is something that we have no control over. It certainly does not arise when we look for recognition.
So I ask you to question the origin of this need when it arises. Ask what am I looking for? What am I not seeing?
Have the courage to walk the path you feel right and true, believe in YOU, and then watch how others freely see your worth without you ever needing it.
Well expressed. Self-doubt isn’t it wonderful this divine comedy? Yet when we are experiencing it we rarely see the humour. Oh how our dark-side is doing it’s job so well when we go there – it’s job being to stop us from ever becoming our full potential. Do you give in or stand in your power, realise what is playing out and acknowledge and love your own dark side because it really is helping you to become whole and complete. Awareness of our every thought and what part of us it comes from is all part of the game to mastery.
Hi Lloyd, An Inspirational and Heartfelt post.
Thanks for sharing x
Oh, yes. I feel the same way. I think sometimes we may shock ppeole with our honesty and openness, but it’s for their good as well as our own. People often seem a little shocked that I so openly talk about being bipolar, but they need to hear it as a normal, medical condition. Who would be ashamed that they have diabetes?And I’m reading your posts backwards to catch up, so the judgmental post further up is something I started thinking about while reading this post. It does open us up for judgment, but at least we know that when we’re loved and liked, we’re loved and liked for who we really are.
Hi Choonei
Thank you for leaving such a transparent comment. Thank you also for taking time to add your thoughts, having people contribute and share their experiences adds immense value to the websites content!
Hey Lloyd, another great precise post, such great questions to ask and very empowering when we move beyond needing recognition for anything. Thank you as always for your wisdom and simplifying what restricts so much creativity. Self doubt.